in Life

Coming up short

The last couple of years I have found myself constantly measuring life by some invisible standard that is grounded on a hazy idea of what my potential is.

And coming up short.

Recently I’ve been looking around me more. I notice that not everyone has the same stringent criteria of what constitutes success or fulfillment of one’s life purpose. They seem happier too.

I am all for aiming for the sky, putting in the hard work, getting out of the rat race, raising capital, becoming a billionaire, whatever. But then I step back and see the bigger picture; I try to suppress that emotional memory, try to stop being depressed because I am not swinging for the fences as I should be doing. I stop comparing myself to the top 1%.

Then I become happy and content. Because I am alive and healthy. Because I don’t have to slave away to secure my food.

But this only lasts for a tiny bit, until once again, I swiftly swim back into my self-perceived ocean of mediocrity.